What does it mean to be a Queen? To Reign? Wear a Crown?The pretentious right to Rule? What does my Reign mean?
The Queen of fucking what.......?
This full moon has been a doozy and has brought up many of the delusions I keep telling myself. The ego who wants to coronate my mind with many empty, hollow ego trips and idea of marketing mayhem. Word tricks and power plays, dominion over and clever slight of psychology to gain ideal market placements. Selling, re-selling, up-selling, fancy shop fronts, strategic symbols and patterns. All the crap that ensures sales, to stay involved in a system that's designed to keep you on a treadmill of fear and want....A fear of letting go and a want of what you can buy, upgrade or desire. I have been in struggle street trying to put one foot in front of the other to comprehend which way is Right, Left, Wrong or Okay. I have yet to give myself permission to accept Peace of where I am at. I speak to you all, as sisters out there...Where then is the real Queendom?
I stand on the top of my tower, built with the Strength of many tears and the struggles of my own hands. I look out over my own Queendom and find that it is actually covered in shite! A Queendom covered in the bullshit of my Journey to this very moment. The shit carried from past lifetimes to this. The apparently happy experiences that turned to shit over time. Or the shit I keep telling myself....to get my shit together, to hold myself high like top shit. The shit I see when I finally take a good hard look in the mirror and find hopeless shit, or just up shit creek....or that I actually don't know shit at all.
Sometimes it's hard to see the reality through the shit. But truly amongst it all I see. I remember.....
I see the rivers made of my tears, she and let go, running down the land. I see forests of oak trees standing tall, brave and reminding me to be strong. I see lion's roaming free with the courage of their convictions, unencumbered by cages and fences. I see horses running wild, their manes blowing free. I see jungles overgrown and uninhabited, with paths not yet slashed and broken, beckoning for a look. I see deep dark woods, whose magical paths are yet to be discovered and guide the way through. This Queendom also has many demons lurking around at midnight, waiting to surprise me with new horrors and nightmares....Of this I am sure. Waiting to bring up past darkness and shadows to be given healing spirit and be knighted with Peace. I see rose gardens that smell so sweet! Waiting to be plucked to offer up their motherly medicine and be of service. But most of all I see me, I see you and I see all of this with the gratitude of a heart that has been through some shit!
My Queendom isn't all made up of rubies and diamonds, rose petals and gold. No.... They only come as pearls of wisdom after much dredging through seas of sand and time, dirt and muck. In shells that require much skill to open them without any self harm. Treasures come along once in a while and make themselves available to you, to remind you that you were already born as Royalty, and to show you the way home. Your Queendom awaits....Only you can pick up your own damn crown and place it upon your head. This is not pretentious, but your very own birthright! The one designed to be forgotten whilst you are busy playing the grand game of Chess of Life in the black and white of shadow and light, yin and yang, life and death. Whilst many have sold themselves out as the pawn, it's time to remember who you are! Anoint yourself and bow before your very own throne. The allegiance pledged is not one of people bowing to you. To settle you on a throne made as a pedestal. So high up that you run the risk of falling of...No! Thrones are strong, supportive and made to hold you and the weight of the Crown. So, again, what does it mean to be a Queen? To reign?
It is a power bestowed upon those who choose to accept responsibility. To carry the weight it brings upon their shoulders AND theirs Souls. To radiate and shine like the jewels upon their Crown. To dissolve darkness where there is no light. When you pluck up the courage to pick up your Crown, you immediately set fire to another, sending torches out to those in the shadows of their own hell. You help turn their darkness in to their possible potential. The womb of their creation.Whilst my Queendom smells of bullshit and roses, it is mine to claim by birthright and reign in allegiance with my fellow Souls. Today, I vow my allegiance to each and every individual in earthly service to shine light, hold sacred space and support your Journey back to reigning your own Queendom. Claiming your Crown is not pretentious, nor is it some clever marketing ploy to get you to buy some crappy, cheesy products, but yours to claim by your birth and your very presence on this earth. A Crown is simply earned in your death and re-birth through the darkness of your hell. Being Queen comes with much responsibility but also has its own rewards. Everything comes at a price...We all prostitute ourselves and sell parts of our self to remain in this world. Queens do not take part in old systems, they take the rule book and they burn it. They birth their own way.....They rule form the Heart.So, fellow Queens, it's time to buckle up the red shoes...and find your feet. Follow the yellow brick road, back to the garden of your Heart. Along the way you might meet lion's, but you need not be afraid. For a wild horse running free may find you with a radiant Queen riding on it's back. With a Crown of light to help guide your way.....And when you have waded through rivers of tears, almost even drowned, made it through the dark forests, fought demons with the commands of your own sword,
that when you are on your knees and feel all is lost, Remember..... That knees are what we bend when we bow and show the deepest reverence. You my dear are already there.Pick up your Crown....and look around at your own Queendom. What's it made of?.....and how did you get there?
What are you the Queen of?This is your story now.
You, are the Author.....Pick you your pen and start writing....Once upon a Time.....And they lived happily ever after...........In Peace - which is grey (think about it)
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